Becoming
by windwhisprer
Summary: [oneshot][H3][39] Hazel didn't care what he was becoming, as long as Sanzo was his.


**A/N: **This is short, though I very much enjoyed writing it. Hazel has always seemed a little obsessed with Sanzo, and I think I covered that well, if not going overboard. I really wanted to write something with Hazel, and then my muse threw this at me. I was inspired by the Saiyuki Requiem movie, and a fanfiction that I read. I totally believe that Sanzo is an obsession. From Rikudo to Dougan, and Hazel, and god knows how many other I'm forgetting. Not to mention of members of the Sanzo-ikkou and his many fangirls. I decided to show a bit of Hazel's obsession towards the blonde monk everyone wants to touch.

So yes, this is HazelSanzo and SanzoGoku.

I hope you enjoyed! Please leave your comments, love yah!

**Becoming**

Anyone would love to bask in the sun's glorious light. Play and dance through the streams of bright, beautiful light that filled the void and flushed away the darkness. He detested the one who was allowed to live in the sunlight that had been given to him. Hated and despised the bright happy creature as it danced within the light, almost taunting him with his freedom. While he, locked away in the darkness, was denied the sunlight he so sought.

And the creature will laugh. Laugh in a cheerful way as it fell to the ground, loving the sun and having the sun love him in return. The creature's trust and love the sun to no end, not caring if it burnt his retinas black. He would still love the sun endlessly and still follow it devoutly. For the creature, he knew would shrivel up and die without the light and love from his sun. He had a sudden aching to see what that would be like. To watch this envious creature shrivel up and die, his soul eaten by the everlasting darkness. He could taste his pure need for the sight.

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_Trust becomes Envy._

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He wondered what would happen if he killed this creature. If he sucked the life from it, allowing his strength to slowly fade as he strangled the life from it. Would the sun accept him then? If he killed this envious creature, would the sun accept him, shining his bright and powerful light on him? Would he finally be able to play in the sunlight, frolic in its love, even knowing that he had to strip the life from a purely innocent creature to do so? Would his stained hands still be permitted to pick flowers and hold onto this sun? No. The sun would turn away from him, and the world would be cast into shadows. Rain clouds would gather and the rain would never stop falling. Because this idiotic, envious creature is dead, no one would be able to bask in the sun's glory.

But perhaps that would be okay. Because then not even this creature would be there to laugh at him. Perhaps if he didn't get to live in the sunlight, then this creature shouldn't either. Then no one would live in the sun, and the rain would be a constant downpour upon them. Though he knew he couldn't do this. Despite this loving creature laughing and playing, he needed to just see the sun. Be able to look at it longingly through the darkness. If it was gone forever then he feared he would be swallowed up by longing, by the pure need to be able to just see the sun, even if this brash creature mocked him all the way.

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_Longing becomes Addiction. _

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Then what? Was he supposed to remain behind, in the shadows, forgotten and unloved? Would he forever more watch this playful creature, while imagining how fun it would be to wring the life from his neck? To watch that playful light slowly die from his eyes? He would simply wait in the shadows, attempting to prove over and over how he deserved to live in the sunlight. To prove he was as good as any other fool the sun chose to love.

He wanted nothing more then to be the one the sun chose to burn his eyes blind. And once blind, he would follow the sun no matter where it went, even if he was walking towards his own death at the hands of a monster. Because if the sun's rays graced him, even once, then he would gladly allow himself to die.

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_Devotion becomes Obsession. _

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He was in the right room. It was the perfect time. Everyone was asleep and his target lay blissfully unaware of the plans he had in store for him. Crawling inside, he let the door close behind him. Suddenly, the room was black. Only a tiny amount of moonlight filtered in from the open window. It cast the room into an eerie glow. It was perfect. He suddenly wondered what this golden-eyed boy's blood would look like when it was drowned in moonlight.

Slowly, the blue-eyed angel stepped across the room, his footsteps nothing but light taps. He was a ghost. A ghost of death, come to deliver his punishment to the victim at hand. The one who had stolen his sunlight. The one he was going to sacrifice to his sun to show how _worthy_ he was. Worthy of the love and the light he had to offer.

He climbed on top of the boy, pinning him to the bed. His subject did not wake, but merely tossed his head, running a hand over his face. "Not now Sanzoooo…." He whined softly. "...A'seep…"

The man's face hardened at the sound of the man's name. He just smiled sickly, leaning down over the boy. "Go to sleep, Goku," he whispered, feeling the boy's body relax under him. Then, he slowly wrapped his fingers around his neck, enjoying the boy's vulnerability. Savoring each moment, he paused before his grip tightened, immediately cutting off his air supply.

Goku's golden eyes shot open in the dark, gasping out chocked surprised at the blue-eyed angel who sat on his chest, restricting his air ways. His hands fell to Hazel's wrist, but the man held firm. His legs began kicking wildly, in an attempt to get the man off of him, but it wasn't happening anytime soon.

Hazel's eyes glinted in insanely as his grip tightened, pushing the boy deeper into the mattress. He could do little more then choke out a gasped whisper. No one would hear him and no one would come to save him. Sanzo would be his soon enough. He couldn't hide his amusement at the pain in Goku's eyes, as the light slowly began to die. Soon enough, and the deed would be done.

A solid punch suddenly sounded across his face, and Hazel flew off Goku, hitting the wooden floor with a hard and painful thud. He could hear the gasps of the brunette in the bed, attempting to catch his breath. As Hazel slowly pulled himself to a sitting position, wiping the blood from his chin, he found himself staring down the barrel of a gun into flaming violet eyes. The man's finger tensed on the trigger, a silent threat that he was prepared to pull it. "What," the man hissed hatred gleaming in his depths, "the hell do you think you're doing?"

Hazel glared up at Sanzo, his gaze shifting from the blonde to Goku, who was sitting up, rubbing his neck and silently glaring. His attention was drawn back to Sanzo, and he glared. "You don't understand," he said coldly, though still quietly. "One day, you'll realize you_ need_ me. We belong together Sanzo. You'll learn one day, and when that day comes you and I shall strip the life from this loathsome _demon!_"

Goku flinched, turning his eyes away in shame, as though Hazel had reminded him of the monster he was. Sanzo's eyes hardened. "Get out."

Hazel pushed himself to his feet, not at all caring about the gun pointed at his middle. "You need me, Sanzo. Realize it."

The barrel of the gun was pushed harder into the man's belly. "I won't hesitate to pull the trigger."

Hazel smiled softly, closing his eyes. "You will come to me, Sanzo," he whispered, before turning and heading from the room. He knew that Sanzo's presence, the presence of the sun, was slowly driving him mad. The need to feel the man's skin under his own was slowly driving his thoughts to dangerous territory. But he didn't care. He let the darkness blind him as he devoutly searched for the sun. Because one day, he knew that he would be able to live in the light of the sun's love. Because the sun needed _him_, not the other way around.

He didn't care what he was becoming.

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_Love becomes Insanity._

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End file.
